The Met Gala themed “Heavenly Bodies: Fashion and the Catholic Imagination” apparently has sent out the wrong memo, not the genuine 'Sunday Best' but 'hey do that circus thing but on acid'. Of course this is the only yearly red carpet event which encourages clashes of bad taste, hype and fashion spectacle, yet many designers and stylists seem to brew a secret hate towards their clients. That, or the clients (that is the Gods we really all worship) in the midst of glueing hair extensions and nail extravaganza (natural is still a thing though), selfie-ing their make-up through and through, have failed to look in the actual mirror.
First things first. What is up with all the halos? Lana Del Rey and Beyonce did it best - back at the Grammy's: Lana rocked hers like a true angel, while Queen Bee just did not leave any room to compete after her Goddess-like performance. Cardi B gave it a hard try, in a jewel and pearl encrusted Moschino, but let's not scowl the pregnant woman. Not that she cares. Janelle Monae and Solange Knowles looked to the point and poised (latest strutting Iris Van Herpen and a bottle of wine in her netted bag). The rest were just a fart-like echoes of what Coachella left: scattered egos in need of a crown at all costs.
Let's not name names, but ladies, some of you just cannot walk the walk in a gown. Aknowledge it, accept it, swipe for pants instead. Natalia Vodianova shined high class on the red carpet in her Balmain pant suit. Amal Clooney, as usual, flawless (wearing Richard Quinn).
The break of Instagram: Katy Perry vs. Rihanna. Miss Perry mixing up the event with a Victoria Secret Fashion Show, the only place where one can deem feathered carcasses 'appropriate'. Rihanna - well Rihanna is just Rihanna (John Galiiano got a shot out so there is always hope).
Lily Collin's made up tears seemed like a childish attempt at a halloween costume referencing Virgin Mary (note: she was actually attempting to channel dark arts and gothic) in juxtaposition to Tracee Ellis Ross' sophisticated nod to priests wearing rose on the 4th Sunday of Lent.
As for relevance Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen never miss. The Gucci gang was a great marketing campaign, and that is only because Jared Leto naturally rocks a Jesus look since the Oscars circa 2014 and Lana Del Rey looked like she just stepped out out of one of her latest music videos (her natural habitat).
Among all the farce Kim Kardashian West's Versace attire appeared surprisingly sober and appropriate.
Whose look are you digging?
p.s. Jonah Hill